Ok, so we went to Trevars graduation in West Blockton last night, it was great to see him walk across and get his diploma and walk away as a high school graduate ready to start the next part of his life, but I had a really hard time enjoying the moment because of my surroundings.
Now I have never considered myself a high class snooty richie rich type, and at the same time, even though I am from the south and a proud graduate of McAdory High School, I have never considered my self a red neck. But this day really made me a proud citizen of Guadalahoover. Below I have listed the Top 5 signs you know your in West Blockton.
5) Graduation= Blockton girls night out.
It did not take long for us to spot a girl in her best outfit or as Jen put it “ She is ready to go clubin tonight!”
I know there is not much to do in Blockton and evidently they us nights like this to look their finest. I know I saw at least 6 girls with short tight skirts and some sort of small tiny shirt with no back in it. I have seen women on Bourbon St .dress with more class
4) Rebel flags and trucks.
This doesn’t need that much explanation. Every small town has one or many , and as the night was winding down I was beginning to get a little disappointed because I had not seen one. But then as we were walking back to the truck, there it was, a large Dodge Ram pick up jacked up as far as it could get and a huge, I mean bed sheet huge, rebel flag flying in the wind.
3) Strange Interracial relationship
By all means I am not against interracial relationships, contrary to what some people believe , I am in a interracial relationship, at least half interracial. For some reason people do not look at mine and Jens marriage as being interracial because she is half Chinese, for some reason in this society only black and white couples fit this category . I have even had a friend look at a black/white couple and be like “gross” but when I said “What about me and Jen” they said well…that’s different, not sure how. I digress.
So as I was walking up to the football stadium to take a seat for the graduation, I saw a nice looking black lady.She was dressed pretty much like , what Jen would refer to as a “ hoochie mama” Very very tight short skirt that showed her apple bottom off really well and a really tight shirt that showed her.....upper half very well. She would have easily fit well in any Snoop Dog, Jay Z, or Flo Rider video. But as I walked up to get a look at who she was, not only talking with, but giving that flirty googley eye to , it was a white guy who I am pretty sure has rode a bull or two in his life and I’m pretty sure was the owner of the Dodge Ram with the rebel flag. So I guess in Blockton when the pickin is slim, anything is possible.
2) Granny and a Polaroid
There was this moment I had a flash back to 1988. As they were calling the names for the students to get their diploma, I saw this proud granny rushing down to the fence to take a picture of her grandson as he walked across the 50 yard line to get his diploma, as she turned around with a great big smile on here face, I saw it, it was like seeing a relic from the 15th century. Jen and I immediately looked at one another and smiled, granny was rockin a Polaroid, and not just any Polaroid. This was the large flat one,it kinda looked like a 13 inch Mac Book, it had the button on the side and when you pushed it, it popped up in a wedge with the flash on top. It was an awesome moment, everything around me begin to move slow as she walked up the steps back to her seat fanning it, apparently granny had been listening to Outkast to much and was “Shaking it like a Polaroid picture”, not her butt but the actual picture. I don’t think granny knows it , but your actually not suppose to shake a Polaroid picture.
1) The Streaker
That is really all I need to say, but I will give details.
As the commencement ceremony began to wind down, and all of the students and faculty were leaving the football field, coming from the visiting end zone, from east to west, was a man in nothing but thong ,tennis shoes, and a JFK mask, yes a John Fitzgerald Kennedy mask. He came running from one end zone to the other, out of the gate and in to the woods. It was absolutely the icing on the cake. It happened so fast Jen was not able to get the camera up in time to take a picture. I would love to have had a pic to add to this blog. I believe the funniest part, was the principal in his ceremony gown along with a few other teachers running towards the woods to try and capture the speedy culprit.
Needless to say this was as much an adventure as it was a ceremony celebrating Trevars graduation. But over all it was great to see Travar get his diploma and see all his friends come up and take pictures and give hugs as they all begin the next step in their life. I am a proud uncle. And to top off the night, we went to Logans and had a big steak!!!!
